A Girl People Remember-A Special Gift Sophie Has

One of the most incredible things about Sophie is that every where we go every one knows her! they
do not just know her name but they remember her! This is not a new phenomenon it has been going on since she was an infant. I used to be stopped in malls by people asking her age and then remarking how 'huge' she was. I would often see those same people and they would want to come see the 'giant' baby. Please understand that she was in fact completely average size so much so that at six months of age she wore six month clothing. Once when we were in a large Palm Springs Hotel we were walking through the lobby to the pool and every one we passed would  smile and yell, 'Hi Sophie'! she was probably three at the time. This caused Bill and I much concern. How and Why do all the guests at this resort know our kid?  Turns out my mom had taken her to the pool earlier in the day and Sophie made her sure she was acknowledged. I have walked her through schools were she was extremely unhappy and dozens upon dozens of kids have called out Hello to her.
This is both remarkably and terrifying to us.  It is so very scary that she has such a strong desire to connect with people that she just talks to any and everyone! She likes almost all people and does not understand what a stranger is in anyway. She has the innocent trust of someone much younger who thinks all people are good, that they are kind and will help her.  Sadly this is not the world we live in. So Bill and I watch her extra closely, I have eyes on her ALL the time. I do not allow her to go to the next aisle at Target or Ralphs, she can not walk up to the Orthodontist while I park as Emily used to do and forget teenage trips to a movie alone. Like I've written before there is an extra sweetness to this and I know I get to witness things parents of other teens do not. But this is not what I want to write about today. Today I want to talk about good, kind strangers and how there are some very special people out there who truly understand our girl.
Our computer has been acting up and after several minutes of trying to print out the order forms for Sophie's lunch I finally forwarded the email to Bill and asked him to take care of it.  There is no traditional cafeteria at Sophie's school and thanks to some great parent volunteers each year arrangements are made with local eateries to prepare and serve the kids lunch. There are just over 350 children at the school from preschool age on up to the young adults in transition- so I am sure you can guess how difficult it is to feed all those people, many of whom are very particular.  I usually allow Sophie to choose two days a week that she would like to buy lunch and she always picks Pizza day as one of her options. This year Grey Block Pizza has agreed to do 'Pizza day'.  We order the lunches two months at a time. Bill sent Sophie's order into Grey Block today and received the following email in return: Thank you for your order. I just wanted you to know that Sophie does not like a lot of cheese on her pizza so I have been making her pizza without cheese' Bill immediately wrote back thanking her and asking if we need to send additional money for this special order or mark it on the form and she replied, 'Sophie approached me very kindly and asked. She is a wonderful young lady and I am so happy that Grey Block was asked to be a part of feeding the wonderful kids a THG! All children deserve to be treated with respect and kindness' Bill and I both cried happy tears to hear this love and kindness extended to the kids.
I am overjoyed to say this is not the first time a stranger has shown our sweet gal kindness above and beyond her duties.  Every Wednesday my mom and Soph have a dinner date at Islands and of course ALL the employees know Sophie. The hostess greets her by name, the waitresses stop by the table to say hi and look at Sophie's action figures, they all even know her very specific order by heart.
Her favorite waitress is Carolina Last year my mom told Caroline that we were bringing three of Sophie's friends to dinner at Islands for her birthday. Several minutes later Carolina asked my mom if it would be okay if she and the others decorated the side room in a Superhero theme for the party.  I thought perhaps she would put up a few streamers and a poster. Imagine my shock when we walked in and there was a huge backdrop of high rises with colorful BAM, POW'S and WOW'S in bright yellow, like in a comic book. She had candy on the tables, balloons, and streamers. I cried and cried when I saw it. This is a young mother with a toddler of her own yet she stayed up late and cut these foam core boards and decorated for this kid! This kid who just comes in to eat.  The generousosity of her heart blew me away. I am happy to report that Carolina is still Sophie's favorite waitress and sometimes Sophie even asks about her little boy.
While Islands is Sophie's all time favorite place to eat Bill and I tend to get a little tired of it so last summer, on a whim, we decided to take her to one of OUR favorites Truxtons. This is a fantastic place in our neighborhood. We enjoy it so much that most Wednesday nights (our date night) you can find us there. The first time we took Soph she was very apprehensive in fact she cried before we left home because we were not going to Islands. We pushed forward and made our way to Truxtons, as we settled into the booth Sophie clamped her hands over her ears and began to kick the chairs. Uh-oh I thought we have made a huge error! This is going to be awful. In the next moment a pretty blonde appeared to see what we wanted to drink, Sophie's eyes light up and she shyly asked for a coke. Ok, perhaps we could do this. Opening the menu I spotted our next roadblock, they no longer had tortilla soup on the menu! I began to read the list of soups to Soph and at first she whined about the lack of tortilla soup then suddenly the blonde was back with her coke, plunging her hand into her pocket Sophie produced a Sonic action figure and the waitress promptly said 'hey! I love Sonic'! Let the bonding begin!! We found out her name was Brittany and she not only liked Sonic but she offered to bring us a sample of another soup.  As she served us our dinner and refilled our drinks her action figure education was put to the test and she did great!!! We took Sophie back to eat there a couple of months later and luckily Brittany was our server again. Several weeks after that when Bill and I were having dinner there one Wednesday night the manager came over to say hello to us then he told us that Brittany went back to school in Santa Barbara and was no longer working there but that he had a gift for us. When he returned he had a few comic book style books, they were for Sophie from Brittany. She had only met her twice but remembered her.
As I said she is a girl people remember.

The "A" Card

Well I finally did it….. I pulled the “A Card”. 

Aimee and I swore long ago that we would never use our child’s “disability” to somehow benefit from it, for example getting a handicap plate for our car and parking where ever we want to.  You may be saying to yourself just because one is Autistic, it doesn’t entitle them to a handicap plate BUT if your Autistic child is the kind of child that would run away from you or can’t pay enough attention to traffic or is easily distracted by loud noises, freaks out, has anxiety, then they CAN get a handicap plate. Aimee and I both know that we do not really need one; we just have to really watch her, pay attention, and hold her hand.  We know there are SO many children out there that DO need that plate because of a physical disability, so we choose NOT to get one.
 

Since I switched jobs in May I really couldn’t schedule the time off I usually do for our summer vacation, so we decided to take a short trip to Palm Springs, it’s a place we all know, a place where Sophie feels safe, where she knows what to expect so we packed up took off for the beautiful La Quinta Resort and Spa!  Now let’s just say it was a bit hot there last week…average of 106 degrees. Although she really doesn’t swim per say….Sophie LOVES to be in the pool, La Quinta is great for this as they have 41 pools on the property!  Of course nothing is ever “normal” or should I say “typical” in our family so when I say that Sophie loves to swim it means that once we arrive at the resort, Sophie becomes OBSESSED with going to the pool. This would be a question she would ask us 10, 15, 20 times a day, yeah I know “kids ask a lot of questions, that’s what kids do” (a friend once told me that in regards to Sophie asking questions over and over).  Sophie is SO obsessed with the swimming; she would ask me if she can still swim WHILE she was swimming…its mentally draining. 

On Friday, which was the fourth of July, I took Sophie to the main pool and tried to give Aimee a break. We didn’t get there until about 10am and by then all the spots with umbrellas were taken. I have to sit nearby and keep a constant eye on Sophie since she really does not know how to swim there wasn’t a shaded spot that I could sit in near enough to the pool in 105 degree heat. I looked around the pool there were only about a dozen umbrellas and more than one hundred chairs. I was trying to be a good dad and helpful husband. I knew that if she did swim we would all have at least 30 minutes of peace that is a lot of time for us; I decided to sit in the heat so Sophie could enjoy her swim.  As I sat in the heat looking around I couldn’t help to think how a Waldorf Astoria Hotel, a MULTI Million dollar property can only offer 12 umbrellas at their main pool? My immediate thought as I am in the Service Industry was, if there is more shade, more people will come and spend more money at the pool bar on drinks and food, how can they not know this? I sat and baked and thought more and more about it .Finally I decided to ask the Pool Manager if there were more umbrellas, when I told him my theory of more shade equals more money he looked at me surprised and said “yeah. right?” and walked away.  At this point I thought why not write an email from my I Phone to the hotel NOT complaining but just pointing out this issue, this is when I did it…. This is when I pulled the “A Card”.

I wrote an email explaining how  WE LOVE THIS HOTEL, it is beautiful, we always come and always will stay here but it’s a bit hard keeping an eye on my daughter, who has autism (A Card), in the pool while I am  sitting in the sun without the benefit of some shade.  I even told them my theory of more shade equals more money.  I didn’t expect anything. I felt I had voiced my compliant and offered them a helpful suggestion at the same time. Then the best thing happened, the hotel manager actually called my cell!!!! First he apologized, I made it clear to him I was NOT complaining, I love your hotel!! I just wanted to point this out and you know what? He agreed! He even sent an umbrella just for us at the main pool and sent additional ones as well for other guests! 

Later in the day I received yet another call from the Concierge asking if there was anything they could do, again I made it clear I was not complaining. The Concierge asked what my child’s name was and asked if she like toys…toys????? All of you who know Sophie know the answer to that!!! I told her about a certain toy that caught her eye at one of the gift shops and about an hour later there was a knock at our door, a hotel employee handed me a gift bag and a card. It was for Sophie! The card first apologized and then thanked me for the suggestion of more shade, and then in the gift bag were 2 of the little figures that Sophie was eyeing earlier that day!!! To say Sophie was excited and happy is putting it mildly!

I love this hotel even more now; they showed they care, not just with the toys but for sending extra shade to the main pool so the other parents could benefit from it. 

Yes. I used “the A card” but I feel I used it for all the best reasons! And who knows….I may use it again someday? Anyone have the number to the LA Kings Ticket office? LOL