OUCH!!! And Other Sensory Lessons I've Learned

I have been bitten, pinched, smacked, head butted, licked, sniffed, had my breasts groped, hair pulled and my bottom squeezed. No I was not trying to exit a crowded dance club I may have been grocery shopping or putting away dishes when most of these deeds were done. Sophie has a sensory processing disorder. This means her brain has trouble receiving and responding to information that comes through her senses. Sometimes she is overly sensitive to things in her environment.

When she was three we took a road trip to Yellowstone. At the first hotel she grabbed the tiny bar of soap provided and smelled for the rest of the twelve day trip. At one point the slippery soap flew from her hand in the car, she began to scream and cry. Bill had to pull over and I had to crawl around the mini-van searching for the soap. She hated Yellowstone with its strong smelling sulfur caldrons.  Sobbing and yelling out, no more yucky poo-poo most of the time we were there.

Loud noises also affect her. Fire alarms, sirens, and the thundering volume in theaters are a challenge for her. As I said in a previous post our most successful dining out venture on vacation was when we used ear plugs to her manage the volume. We called her ‘the sleeper’ the one and only season she tried soccer. The stimulus of the other kids hollering coupled with them running towards her caused Sophie to simply lie on the field covering her head.

We noticed very early on that she took little notice of things like very hot/cold water. Injuries that appeared to be painful she did not pay attention to. On the other hand a tag in a tee-shirt would send her into a fit of rage and tears that could last an hour. I became brand loyal to Hanes No Tags Shirts. Hair brushing is still an ordeal no matter how much No More Tangles I use.

Her difficulty interrupting sensations from her muscles or joints, causes her to bite and smell her toys, tackle others (mostly me)stand too close when talking to people, hit too hard, bite and ram her head into me. She often stomps and jumps in the house resulting in pictures, vases and knick knacks toppling over.

I try and remember these things when I find myself a victim of her sensory seeking behaviors but I am only human. It hurts. She is almost as tall as me and over one hundred pounds if I am not expecting it she can knock me down. Some days I want to push back, slap her or bite her too. Those are the times when I have learned to just walk away. This is what happened yesterday upon our return from the beach. We had just a few moments to get her changed and ready for her Teen social group- this was my first mistake not leaving enough transition time. I was attempting to rinse the sand from her feet so I was bent forward when suddenly……..BAM! Her head bangs into me catching me in that tender spot right above my eyebrow. Tears immediately spring to my eyes. Taking a breath I stand and walk out of the bathroom. 

It is hard not to react. It is embarrassing to stand in line at the store while your fourteen year old daughter tries to put her hand down your shirt or is licking your arm, ignore the harsh stares when others overhear me saying You may not bite. I have to remind myself it is not her fault, she is not trying to hurt or draw attention to us. Some days are just tougher than others.